I have always scoffed at writers who use lines from popular songs as sentences in their columns. In my opinion, it is corny and not as creative as the writer would like to think. But after the month I have just had, I have to ask, why does love always feel like a battlefield? (Thanks for the line, Ms. Sparks)
When I wrote my first column for SDGLN.com, I discussed my recent single status and entrance back into the dating world. Over the last month or so though, I have been on an up-and-down roller-coaster ride of emotions, experiencing my fair share of giddy little girl moments and heartbreaks.
As I go through the processes of ending my former relationship and searching for new love, every single love song seems to apply to me. Previously, songs were just songs. If the beat was catchy, I liked it; but now I find myself analyzing the lyrics of every love song out there and relating it to myself.
Throughout my breakup, I have asked myself many times, how did I become so obnoxious? (Pink, "Please Don't Leave Me") I also find myself doing things that I wouldn’t normally do. I have been needy, mean, and overbearing. I have said things I would not normally say to a person and I don’t always feel so good about it. Living with my ex-boyfriend for another month has me living in what used to be a funhouse that now seems to be filled with evil clowns (Pink, again, circa “Who Knew”).
And then there are the boys I meet. Over the last month I have told a few of them I think I’m falling for you (Colbie Caillat) just to find out that some of them are not as into me as I am into them, bringing to mind Taylor’s You Belong With Me. There is one boy in particular who I think is the love of my life. In fact we have decided that we are soul mates, spend almost every waking hour together, but are not yet an official “thing.” It kind of feels like I am caught in a bad romance (Lady Gaga), but there is something in the way he moves, that attracts me like no other lover (tribute to the Beatles).
You would think that people would have enough of silly love songs (Wings) so I am going to stop the references there. However, I have to admit that music has certainly gotten me through these tough times. Embarrassing as it is to admit, I have found myself addicted to Delilah’s Love Songs show and tune in every evening to KYXY 96.5 radio. While driving I listen to each song carefully, sometimes I cry, sometimes I get excited and sometimes I get angry. It is my escape and my time to privately be a little bit psycho. We all have those moments, right?
I am still searching for that day when loves takes over (sorry, had to throw one more in there…thanks Kelly and David) and Mr. Right sweeps me off my feet. Until then, I’ll keep living my life through the love songs of the day and dramatizing my love challenges. After all, all you need is love!