Dennis Slade created Bi Bar so bisexuals have a place to gather locally.
Bisexuals in San Diego have a place to meet up and probably don’t even know it. It’s called Bi Bar, and organizer Dennis Slade says it’s a group that, “celebrates the positive aspects of being able to love people no matter what their gender is.”
With all that’s going on around the country with RFRA laws and other bills that marginalize LGBT people, it’s nice to know that San Diego is a diverse and accepting city. However, the bisexual community doesn’t appear to have a place to call their own.
Slade told SDGLN that he created the event through the social gathering app Meetups because the community was in need of a forum where bisexuals-plus can, “get together and be positive about their sexuality.”
Over several years of attending social gatherings there was one thing he kept hearing over and over again, "I wish there was a 'Bi Bar' where you could go and be social and just be, without having to worry about being called strange for checking out both boys and girls."
He says creating the Bi Bar gathering was a great way to address this void in the San Diego LGBT community.
“Many bi-plus individuals, especially those who do not know any other openly bi-plus individuals, feel burdened and ashamed to be themselves, even with their spouses/life partners,” he said. “It is my hope that Bi Bar members feel good about being bi-plus, and that they can have fun interacting with other bi-plus people. I feel that the fun thing is really, really important to the concept of Bi Bar.”
Bi Bar is not a physical place, rather it is a monthly social gathering in which members decide where to go for an evening at various San Diego venues. They are 100-percent accepting of however you choose to self-identify; Slade says they don’t use labels.
“We also strive to be trans, poly, kink, disability friendly, size-accepting, and culturally diverse,” he adds.
Anyone can join Bi Bar as long as they are 18 or over. The people Slade feels will get the best experience out of the event are bisexual, pansexual and fluid people.
Monosexuals, those who self-identify as gay or straight, can also join as long as they understand the non-judgmental nature of the members.
Meetings are generally once a month, but there are times when the group gathers more than that for special events such as excursions to the Diversionary Theatre, the FilmOut LGBT Film Festival, the Pride parade, or gaming at Tabletop Commons.
Congregation spots have included Hillcrest Brewing Company, Red House Pizza, and the Living Room.
Slade says the meetups are purely free-form, “We usually sit around a table, order drinks and food, and then generally schmooze. We discuss whatever's on our minds, or how it is to navigate life as bi, pan, fluid people, or ‘who's hot and who's not’ irrespective of their genders,” he said. “Often we get Bi Bar attendees who have never been in a group of people like themselves, and in this space they can be open about being attracted to males and/or females and/or trans-people - with no judgment and no repercussions.”
It’s free to join the Bi Bar group, you simply need to sign up at the Meetups site. Slade says the group has little-to-no expectations for new members other than that they must be respectful to the diversity of the party.
“We ask that people show up when they RSVP,” Slade explains, “that they tip well when they pay for their food and drink, and that they be tolerant and respectful of everyone else who attends. Just be grown folks with open minds.”
The next event will be held at Red Wing Bar and Grill in North Park on April, 15.
If you are interested in joining Bi Bar click HERE and RSVP.